Blog Layout

The Adventure of a Lifetime

Susan Grandfield • Feb 07, 2024

Being human doesn’t always feel easy or joyful and yet I have a strong belief that it can.

It has been becoming clearer and clearer to me that that we can create a very different experience for ourselves and others than the one we are living but that it requires a willingness to go on an adventure (an adventure of a lifetime perhaps!). 

 

I have always had this belief. Even as a young child I had a sense that life was about enjoyment and happiness and I didn’t get the perspective that life is hard and something we have to learn to “get through”.  Somehow I just knew that it didn’t have to be that way, that it was possible to experience life differently but, as happens with many of us, I got caught up in the collective culture of the West and found myself working hard to be successful, conforming to expectations and seeking validation from others to feel good about myself and my contribution to the world. In effect, I set out to be as good a human being as I could be and to be as effective at “doing” life as I could.


In the pursuit of achieving success and navigating the challenges we encounter at each stage of life it seems many of us lose touch with who we are and what life is really all about. It’s like we become distant pen pals to that part of ourselves. Going from the strong intimate connection that comes with regular honest and vulnerable communication, sharing what is going on in our world, our hopes and dreams and offering a sense of support, understanding and reassurance. To a sporadic and increasingly superficial relationship as life becomes distracting, and maintaining a deeper connection moves down the priority list in favour of wrestling to stay on top of the overwhelm of a busy life. 




But maybe, like me, you have felt the intermittent nudge to reconnect and hang out with the carefree, relaxed version of yourself that you remember from an earlier time in your life.


We begin this adventure of a lifetime as wide open, expansive, creative, loving, curious and innately wise little beings full of possibility, potential and optimism. But through our experience of interacting with others and the world around us we, unconsciously, wrap ourselves up in patterns of behaving and thinking which serve to protect us from the perceived risk of following that childlike energy. In doing so we mute the bountiful energy that we come into this world filled with and find ourselves living from an energy born out of a desire to know, to be in control, to fit in to which ever group or tribe we are close to and to succeed at this game of life in ways defined by others. We become like a padded version of our former childlike selves, protected, numbed and out of touch with who we really are, often without even realising this is what’s happened.


Then we hit a point which causes us to start to ask questions of ourselves and the world around us again. It may be the midpoint of life or when there is a transition happening (children leaving home, end of a relationship, retirement, living with an illness) which can cause an existential crisis of some sort. We start to question who we are, why we are here, what our future looks like and what the point of our lives is. When that happens it’s like beginning a game of pass the parcel. 




Remember as a child passing that big package around a circle, hoping for the music to stop so you could unwrap it and get closer to the prize in the middle? Peeling back the layers, one by one, seeing what lies beneath and getting more of an impression of the shape of what sits right in the middle. It was fun, exciting and you were totally focused on discovering that prize. In many ways, this adventure of a lifetime is like that game of pass the parcel! Its sole purpose is about rediscovering who lies beneath all the layers of conditioning, programming, habits and identities and in the process of rediscovery we start to show up differently in the world. The beautiful thing about that is……when we show up differently in the world, the world shows up differently for us. It sets in motion a creative transformation which has infinite possibilities for how you can experience life. 


The layers of ‘wrapping paper’ are ego programmes, they are ways we have learnt to navigate the world around us. Helpful up to a point but most of us reach a place when we feel the constraining nature of them, we feel so out of touch with the feelings of peace and joy and fulfilment, wonder and awe that were an everyday occurrence as a child and we start to ask why and how to reconnect with that part of ourselves again.


The wonderful thing is it is always, and has always been there, like the gift in the middle of the parcel, and so life is really an experience of rediscovering, reconnecting and unlearning what we think we know. 


There is no right way to do this. There is no quick 10 step process or hack which will get you to a place of enlightenment in the next 30 days. It is a journey which requires a willingness to be uncomfortable, to feel disoriented, to see the world and yourself and others differently and the courage to stay on the path when you feel drawn back to the comfort and familiarity of doing things the way you’ve always done them. It also requires a deep desire to be free from all of the layers and old ways of being in order to experience the simplicity and wonder of life again. What you get in return is a sense of inner balance and peace which enables you to face into any and all situations with more confidence, clarity and coherence. 


It isn’t an adventure of a lifetime in the sense that it’s a one off, never to be repeated experience. It’s an adventure of a lifetime because (and to quote very famous song lyrics!) every breath you take and every move you make are invitations to journey further into this different way of being.


Are you up for it?



If reading this has resonated and sparked your curiosity about your own adventure of a lifetime, perhaps you might be interested in joining the upcoming Inner Work Summer School - 3 weeks to begin or go deeper on your own adventure of a lifetime.  Check out the IWSS page here.


What do you need help with?

by Susan Grandfield 28 Oct, 2024
Part 4 - the way forward In this final part of the series, we are looking at the way forward. What does this awakening mean and how do we stay on the path that we’ve started to walk down?
Self-acceptance and allowing are key to the journey of being who we are in the world.
by Susan Grandfield 21 Oct, 2024
This is an invitation to be curious about the freedom that comes from finally letting go of the need to fit in, to embrace how you see the world and how you want to approach life and the ripple effect that can have on the lives of those around you. It is all about self-acceptance and allowing.
There is a struggle when we set out on a quest to be who we are more in the world.
by Susan Grandfield 14 Oct, 2024
The struggle of an idealist in a world of pessimists, pragmatists and realists is that at times it can feel very lonely, like we’re sitting on the edge of the crowd not being invited into the conversation. Everyone is looking in one direction and when we point out that there is another direction they could look in we feel dismissed, not heard and ridiculed for romantic notions about the world. But it doesn't have to feel that way.
We need more idealism in the world to balance the pessimism
by Susan Grandfield 08 Oct, 2024
Idealist: “Someone who believes that very good things can be achieved, often when this does not seem likely to others”. Rather than hiding away, agreeing with others, making myself wrong for holding a more hopeful view of the world or criticising myself for being naïve I backed myself and stood behind my beliefs.
Find your way back to balance, ease and contentment and really start living.
by Susan Grandfield 19 Aug, 2024
We are under the misapprehension that we need to push ourselves outside our comfort zone if we really want to experience life and be successful. But that is not true. Finding our way back to our comfort zone is a vital part of experiencing life with more ease, enjoyment and freedom.
Lighter way to uncover wisdom
by Susan Grandfield 03 Jul, 2024
The reality of life is that we forget and fall into the predictable traps of the ego and its susceptibility to the outside world but that finding our way back to inner peace and stability comes from remembering that our experience is created from the inside.
Discover how changing the stories you tell yourself about yourself can transform your life.
by Susan Grandfield 27 May, 2024
We are incredibly talented at creating fictitious stories about ourselves and going through life without editing them, updating them or realising we can actually re-write them. Discovering how quickly life can change when you start to pay attention to your stories.
Go on an adventure of a lifetime
by Susan Grandfield 07 Feb, 2024
We begin this adventure of a lifetime as wide open, expansive, creative, loving, curious and innately wise little beings full of possibility, potential and optimism. But through our experience of interacting with others and the world around us we, unconsciously, wrap ourselves up in patterns of behaving and thinking which serve to protect us from the perceived risk of following that childlike energy. Now is the time to "unwrap" those protective layers and reconnect with who we really are.
There is a real freedom in approaching things with an experimental mindset .
by Susan Grandfield 30 Jan, 2024
Experimenting is fundamentally about trying things out and not being attached to a particular outcome. It is about giving things a go and learning from whatever happens. There is a real freedom in approaching things with an experimental mindset and I believe it can be brought to all aspects of our lives.
Bliss, joy, gratitude, peace, moments to just be
by Susan Grandfield 22 Sept, 2023
Like me, are you also someone who tends to plan moments of bliss rather than allow them to happen? Ridiculous as that may sound, I realise that when I am in my familiar environment doing familiar and routine activities I tend to plan for moments of bliss or joy to happen sometime in the future, when all of the things I need to do have been done. I am discovering the possibility of experiencing moments of bliss at any time and without the preplanning.
More posts
Share by: